by Joe Jeffrey
Sergei the meerkat reviews his top caravan must-haves, as he returns from hitting the road in his caravan
Everyone’s favourite meerkat and – ahem – caravan enthusiast, Sergei Vladamanov, recently toured the finest landmarks across the UK in his caravan and, whilst embracing the typical British weather, also took time out to test the latest accessories that have evidently proven “essentials” for his travels.
Residing in Meerkovo, Russia, as he does, Sergei usually spends less time caravanning and more time fixing computers. However, the IT expert decided to spend his one and a half day’s annual leave on a whistle-stop tour of the UK, exploring the best of what the British Isles has to offer and, in his infinite wisdom, decided to take three of his very own caravan must-haves with him. Join the CaravanTimes as we take a look at what Sergei deems essential(s) to any caravanner.
Multifunction Knife Clip Watch
Hailed as “incredibles” by the fluffy, vertically challenged mammal, Sergei’s multifunction knife clip watch is similar to a Swiss Army Knife, but frankly not as good – despite what Sergei says.
“Like its catchy name tell you, it have knife, clip, watch and compass all in one! The watch glow green so you can tell time at night or when hide under bed,” the meerkat excitedly begins.
“The compass is very handy for navigate Mr Aleksandr’s mansion as well as great outdoors. Scissors are good for trim claws, knife for prepare grubs for lunch and flashlight for find little meerpup’s room at night. And, most importants it make you feel like legendary camp man Mr John Rambo.”
Well, we can’t exactly say Sergei resembles Sly Stallone in the slightest – possibly apart from height – however we’re all for whatever floats his boat.
Travel Washing Machine
Next up, it’s the travel washing machine. We’re not entirely convinced the machine would fit into many people’s caravans owing to the sheer size of it, but Sergei seems relatively pleased with how it performed on his travels.
“This technologies is the future of wash your clothes. Is come with anti-limescale ball – I not know what limescale is but it sound delicious. Is handle range of garments, from shirt, to tie, to shirt and tie together, is wash them all! Is also good size for meerkat to enjoy hot bubble bath. Sometimes I make bath and wash clothes at same time.”
Well, it’s certainly multi-functional, but not without its flaws, as Sergei admits: “Downside is temperature settings do take some getting used to. Half of my shirts are now baby meerpup sized. But overall is much more simples than wash clothes by claw. No longer will I have to pack my washboard and mangle into suitcase.”
We’re all for innovation, but perhaps a little too much can be a bad thing. Don’t tell Sergei we said that though!
Solar Panel
Finally, Sergei’s favourite. The IT impresario seems to favour this the most – perhaps because he built it. “solar panel is cut edge of technologies that harness power of sun to help cook tin of beans,” he says. “All I do is plug panel into caravan, then 72 hours later I have enough energy for watch two whole episodes of Sean Bean romancing ladies in ‘Sharpe’ Betamax.”
As technologically advanced as Sergei claims to be, and with the introduction of many solar panels throughout the caravanning industry today, we’re not entirely convinced this DIY job is up to scratch, but who are we to argue with someone with such sharp teeth?
Alas, Sergei may have returned to Russia, but his ‘bloggings’ remain. So, to read more on Sergei’s UK caravan adventure, check out his blog by clicking here.
